I think I'm pretty much screwed at this point

[Thunderchild Maximus]

I almost hesitated to make a thread about this, since I'm not really sure what can be said, but... I guess, here goes.

I've got some medical issues, I'm pretty certain. Some of you may recall years ago that I was hospitalized due to my appendix going off like a grenade, leading to a month of tubes and drugs and all manner of other horrible things. I survived of course, but now the plumbing don't work so good and I have to be very careful of what I eat, otherwise I end up in excruciating pain. Often, I end up like that anyway. Secondly, and this is even more embarrassing to admit to anyone anywhere (although some of you more observant folk may have noticed already) that my brain don't work so good either, as it were. Needless to say, I can't remember any time in the past 10 years or so where I felt normal, or even consistently happy for more than a day or a few hours. As time has gone on, even things I love give me less joy and I find it more and more difficult to concentrate on even simple tasks. I used to pride myself on my attention span; the latest Halo novel sits unfinished on my shelf. Not because it was bad or uninteresting, I just, I couldn't do it. I don't know why. I was never the biggest fan of crowds or large groups of people, but now I feel incredibly tense even when I'm out amongst people I'm familiar with. I don't sleep well or enough and I find myself literally drifting in and out of consciousness even when I'm doing something. Of course between all of this are bouts of simmering anger.

I recognize these things as serious problems, because they add up and as you might imagine, make it very difficult to function. It was my intent to talk to my family doctor about these problems, but she retired and now it's practically impossible to find another one who will take new patients.

My more immediate (and wonderfully new) problem is that my parents have decided that I have some kind of "attitude problem" and that my interests would best be served by being kicked out of the house at the end of September. My job does not pay enough to sustain even the cheapest rent in this city (Really, it should still be called a town; we have no central core and public transit is a joke here) and other jobs require 5 years experience or a degree in order to shovel pig shit. Literally.

I have no one I can stay with and no one I can ask for help, I don't have a support system of any kind in place. I'm going to see if the night crew at work is looking for extra people, but it was hard enough getting hours before the recession; they've been letting people go and I have to fight with Patrick Fucking Swayze in order to keep just one additional shift.

Oddly I don't know if I even have the energy to even care about any of this. Someone once said, "Voyager is crap, but in a kind of amiable, undemanding kind of way. For a ship that's supposedly lost tens of thousands of light-years from home, everyone's very laid-back about it, and after a while you can't help falling into that same chilled groove about the whole thing. "So, Janeway just made another insane bipolar decision that fucked up their chances of getting home. Ehh." I feel like I'm on Voyager. I will likely end up living on the street come the end of September and even as I look for places to live and a job to support that, I feel like I don't even really care. Yet I still feel stressed enough to want to vent.

I don't know what any of this means or what I want or really what the point of writing this was.

[Dusty]

That...is horrifying.

I'm not really sure what to offer here. Have you talked about your health issues with your parents? If they're aware you're not functioning properly it would seem ridiculously cold of them to just kick you out with no way of supporting yourself.

[Thunderchild Maximus]

I've tried talking to my mother about it in the past, she suggested that we get some ice cream in order to deal with it. We never got the ice cream. They're both aware that my insides are a source of pain but they don't seem to really care. My father doesn't listen to anyone for any reason about any subject, talking to him would be a waste of time.

[Pants-less Bard]

Hmmm, I agree. Are there social service agencies that you can contact? Many places in the U.S. have some sort of rent assistance program for those that are working, but not making enough to cover rent.

[Dusty]

I believe Thunderchild's in Canada. I'm not sure if they have comparable programs.

[Thunderchild Maximus]

You'd think there would be, given that this is indeed Canada. That said, I make so little money that I doubt I'd apply, and even then I'd have no money left for things like food or soap. Still it's something I hadn't thought of, and I'll see if there are any options there.

[Pants-less Bard]

I believe Thunderchild's in Canada. I'm not sure if they have comparable programs.

Yeah, I should have clarified that I was wondering if there were similar programs on his side of the border.

And TM, you should definitely look. If it's a real possibility that you'll have no home in September, you want to start working on this stuff right now. The goal of this type of program is to keep people off the street and out of homeless shelters. If you've got a job, that's a major leg up. Even if it pays shit.

[chrysalis]

Exactly where in your abdoninal area is the pain? Is it the stomach itself or another area?

[ashes]

yikes.

I echo what others have said. Continue trying to get through to your parents, be on the lookout for a better job whenever possible, and look into any social services that might be able to help you in your situation.

I really hope things work out for you.

[Thunderchild Maximus]

Exactly where in your abdoninal area is the pain? Is it the stomach itself or another area?

Below the stomach, right around where my appendix used to be, actually, and in that whole guts area. Lately my stomach has been hurting as well, that's probably just from the stress of the situation though.

Thank you for your support guys, means a lot to me.

[MrBlud]

Christ that's horrible TM.

I hope you can find some sort of rent assistance and/or some way of figuring out what's got your insides all messed up.

Anything we can do let us know.